Friday, February 23, 2007

u said u guys were doing double because u all din teach us well..when u all should have been doing that from the start. hmm..wadever. u said we din try. u said our standard dropped. u said we become so slack. u think we did not try? yea..i pointed out that fact. the fact is....we tried ok? u think not? did u even know wad we did? did u even go try to see...quite disappointed..at the fact that u all just did not understand. somehow..we were dependant on ourselves..coz u all were nvr there for us. u were nvr there to comfort us..to really go through thick and thin with us..


just one question: did u every feel sad because of us before? did u? did u ever feel upset when something we did goes wrong? did u ever think of the fact that we were still juniors also and that we still need ur help? did u ever help us when we asked for or even begged for? no.


do u even know wad we are thinking? i guess not. because..we were thinking of working doubly hard..so as to regain our 3rd placing. do u know? u think we bo chab after the comp meh? u think we not stressed? because for u all...u all had ur seniors who really helped u all..but us. no..nothing..its that called unity? u all had someone there for u...but us..we have a junior batch to take..and we have no help from u all. i really dun wish to go on anymore la.. i sound very super nasty in this post lo..because it is obvious who i'm referring to. but....since i can't say it face to face..i might as well say it here..


and
why? can u change? seeing the fact that u are bringing the whole unit down? letting the whole unit suffer for u? or even with u...yea..its unity..but u can't expect them to do punishments with u the whole time. i'm sorry for telling u off. and sorry for losing my control.but i hope u will learn. they tell us not to help u all..so that u all can be independent..but when u all are struggling ...just can't stand by and do nothing. today.....2 ppl quarrelled because of u..they fought..and u made a few ppl cry. made them feel upset, miserable and disappointed. its not onnly the madms who are pekchek okkay? haish..no one understands how we feel. nvm...independent is goooood. is good. good.
had trng today..i don't know
can i dun talk abt it..hmmm..nvm..i know for sure maybe someone will be here and will see this...but i still feel like typing it la..haish ..its gonna be a POSITIVE post!!


as usual..fall in then report..it was a trng for us sec 3s to take..sec 1s are really CMI..can vomit blood..but sec 3s try lo...try very super hard can. please dun say we did not. den did PT supposed to be PT I/C with van..but then somehow become edna and van..haish..nvm..den after PT had footdrill..sec 3s were teaching sec 1s..while madms were taking sec 2s. apparently, the sec 2s were getting a lecture. and because they dragged their boots after being warned for the upteenth time..they had to march bare footed. digusted? nahh..its just abit diulian.


then madms ask sec 3s go fall in with sec 2s..leaving the one and only footdrill I/c edna..to teach the sec 1s. aiya...saw sec 2s in socks..so asked for permission to pei them..yea..i did it..but some how too fast..leaving no time for qh and yf to ask as well..sorry yea? and hai u all to be scolded as non-initiative ppl. really sorry! =((


yea..marched around in socks..cool eh. with ncc land and vb ppl staring at our beautiful yet smelly socks..hmm. then continued..which is when our GREAT thing started out..for every mistake we did wrong..whole squad auto down 5. and surprisingly..madms decided to do with us..no..do double of wad we did. and for the rest of the thing..don't need to elaborate. just pissed. and i got so disappointed and upset that i scolded him. haish ..nvm.


went home after that. felt so sick and tired man. but still gotto go out for a family thing with friends..stomach hurt badly..but ren. finally back to post le.. i warn u ppl..the next post ain't gonna be nice. =))

Monday, February 19, 2007

i hate getting scoldings for nothing..does it really make u happy to scold me? huh? i really don't understand.


trying not to complain..told some ppl to shut me up..ahhhh..everyone just shut me up. seal my mouth with tape so i won't talk at all.

Sunday, February 18, 2007

HAPPY BIRTHDAY EDNA!! can't put the pics up now..but will put it up when i return hopefully..hope u have had a meaningful and happy birthday..put all unhappiness in the past yea? and move on..we'll always be there for u if u need it..so dun give up in everything u do..must stay happy and smile.. jiayous. =))

Friday, February 16, 2007

today was CNY celebrations..got lion dance and dragon dance in the parade square..den after it was over..we proceeded to the hall where more performances were held..not bad la..but quite alot of ppl were sian diao..den after recess-ed back in class..everyone was super down....for some reason...then decorated the class..i was not of much help la..coz i just sat down there and stone..but yea..den after sch...i suddenly disappeared..wow..no la..yf, bj, yh and me went to ask central to buy cake..while the rest pei edna go eat...their so called eat...is go there drink milo and stone..aiyo..dunno wad happen la.. den we ran from place to place in search of that oh-so-wonderful cake!! wow..okkay..den finally bought tiramisu cake..den after chiong back to sch just in time to 'suprise' edna..which she dun seem suprised at all..hmmmmm..nvm..then cork-up la...sian...but den we just took photos..den i cut cake for everyone..aiya..some ppl not co-operative la..give u cake..cut hao hao le..den just take la!! walao...nvm.. then...iso-ed for awhile for some reason... den went on to causeway..hmm they went to catch GHOST RIDER..while sam zh and me went to swensens for lunch..hmm..we had seafood chower..nice lo! then we ordered the topless 5..nice name man..haha..den ate it..but as u know..we for sure nvr finished de..but then do wad with the remaining?? yea...MIX IT TOGETHER!! and u get a sticky creamy liquid...awwww man.. okkay..and sam filled her little milk bottle with it..so ke xi..hmm.. and we went kiddy palace in search of new milk bottles... but dun have... den i went home..while sam and zh waited for the rest to finish their movie..


had to go home early coz need to finish up hmwk..going to malaysia tmr..sian..have to wake up at 3++ 4..so yups.. HAPPY early CHINESE NEW YEAR PPL!!! =))))


i don't know why u're doing this. i really dunno..i don't understand..can u at least tell me why. den i can try to understand..i'm trying my best le..but somehow u just don't seem to care. u said i wasn't nice enough to u..ain't i being nice to u now?? or is it too late? if it is..can u at least tell me? so that i don't need to try so hard.

Sunday, February 11, 2007

just chanced upon someone's life in UG..after reading her post..i felt i could share her feelings..i don't know why. the feeling of being laughed at..by ppl whom u would have thought to be ur bestest of friends..but they actually backstabbed u..called u names. but they don't understand..they don't understand wad we are going through. just because we don't show it or tell..doesn't mean we don't get hurt..don't get upset. people who seem strong physically might not always be strong mentally. but this point no one understands. they just keep doing wad they are doing..they don't even care of wad's become of u.


in UG..everyone are trained to be strong..but surely it takes time to train..and during the process.. there is bound to be a time that u would feel hurt someway or another..and someone might be there to share it with u..and just as u think u could trust that person..because he/she had gone through lots of things with u..he/she just somehow disappeared. disappeared...changed..into another person..a person u could no longer recognise. time changes ppl..but why of all ppl..change this person u were just abt to put all ur trust and hopes into?


she had a passion..a passion towards her CCA. and everyone thought she was a superwoman..but they didn't know that even a superwoman would have her weakness..a point in time where she would be in a corner...crying. feeling sad..feeling hurt. but no one cares. that's because ppl are just so selfish. they only care abt themselves. and they call themselves best friends. a true friend would be by ur side no matter wad..to catch u if u were ever to fall..to pick u up when u drop. to hold ur hands and pull u along..and nvr to leave u if u needed any help. and as a leader..she is trying her best. but ...somehow.. its still not enough. maybe she is bias? and that's why she does not get full respect from all her cadets.


why will cadets wanna quit?? because they feel its no use continuing on in UG because they are not being treated equally. because some ppl rely on their relationship with the NCOs to get into the higher post. then wad abt those who really put in effort? those who really wanna see their unit prosper?? its not fair la..but some NCOs just dont understand..UG these days is getting so bad..even if there are alot of ppl joining..the unit will not be united. how to keep the cadets? the leaders will think...how do i plan a fun trng? UG should be disciplined...and not a slacking CCA..but the cadets don't feel this way. somehow..they just don't understand how we feel. we have so little ppl in our CCA now..and we are trying our UPMOST BEST already..we ask the sec 2s..try to get more ppl..but somehow..they just give us crap. i can see some are trying..but its only like 1 person who is trying..if not 2. why? why can't u all just see the need to recuit more ppl?!!!! WHY?! do u want to wait until the end of the year..and nearing the date for u all to take over then realise u don't want such a small squad. and then only start giving ur best into trying to get more ppl? why..why do this? when u can do it now.. there's still time..but u all just don't see it. and when we nag at u all..u all give us AP..u think its very nice to nag meh? u know how pekchek we feel anot? we really feel like giving up le u know? but...how? we r just about to take over. and there's already some problems..complications that u all don't understand yet. don't make the same mistakes as u la..get more ppl..expand the unit..can u all just try to understand for once? to put urself into our shoes? give ur best to this CCA..since u've already joined..there's no use thinking abt 'if only i hadn't joined UG'..just give ur best lo.


ahhh..i don't even know why i'm typing this post. its really no use la..i keep telling myself..i tried le...but i can't help but think its a bit of my fault that everything's wad it is now..that the unit has so little ppl..if only i had gone further out to getting more cadets..haish...maybe its too late?? but i'll keep trying. hopefully things will turn out better. for that her...i dun think u'll be reading this...but yea..dun think too much..some things are not worth u being upset with.

Friday, February 09, 2007

today had trng. super screwed. was I/C ..haish..sian got lesson. got materials, no classroom. den wanna play games, got ball, no court. SIAN!! but in the end improvised lo. no choice la. did footdrill in the 1st part of trng. taught the sec 1s basic, simple footdrills. vomit blood man. wonder how qingyu that batch teach us de. scream until no voice le la. waste my oh-so-precious voice. hmm. wadever. i'm bhb. x)


after footdrills, the was lesson. wow. that was nice. had all my materials. and in the end..no classroom for us to go to..had to run around whole sch in search of sam..intended to borrow class key frm sam..to open the door..but den found out she had IPP. den dunno where is she. den went back up to 3/4..and apparently..that bloody door was so WIDE open. well..nvm..i exercised. den rushed in and reported. long time nvr 'CLASS, KEEP STILL' le. den after that..sabo-ed yf to help me teach paying of compliments and reporting. the basic stuff again.
yf preached ......while i scribbled away..i din know my words on the white board are so ugly de. anyway..i wrote and wrote and wrote..finally finished le den can explain to all . sian..too bad no one was listening. wasted my voice again. why isit so hard just to get everyone's attention??? hmmm..well..saw the sian look on everyone's face..den tried to end the lesson as quick as possible. during our lesson..edna went to look for basketballs for us to play. and yea..as soon as we ended our lesson..i discovered a BIG problem..okkay..not really me..madm xinyu la..we got 2 BB balls..but.........NO COURT!! sian..super sian la..should have saw my damn face. well..finally went to DnT block there play..and during that time we were super screw up. everyone took such a long time just to get into 2 grps. well..its my fault again..for not getting them to do things quick. well...den i just stood there like a piece of rock..and madm weilin asked me wad happened. hmm..wad was i supposed to say???


we ended trng with the usual debrief. den told sec 1s to try on our boots. den tried on beret as well. took down their sizes and all..intending to buy uniforms for them as soon as possible..to make sure they have less chance of quitting. evil right? but its not my idea. x))
finally trng ended. and my leggys are so suan. can't even get up la..and got leg cramps. damn irritating. =))


to u...hope u change ur attitude..u've really changed. i really wish to see the old u.the enthu u. well..maybe its true that ppl will change over time. haish..its really up to u la..coz we can't do anything to help..we can't force u..it will make u hate us even more.

Thursday, February 08, 2007

today was a normal day...initially was supposed to practise our talentime dance today...but had to postpone it....hmmm we had to go for volleyball match.. the match was okkay...first round amk was winning...den yifang was like we sure win de...isit the oppenent bad or amk good?? aiya.. but then the other 2 rounds..we lost by like a few points..sad...den everyone was like gua gua jiao-ing..coz haven't eat lunch. den after the match..me and yf went yishun de north point..eat mac. den talked and talked and talked..very shuang..i like that feeling.=)) thanks YIFANG!!!


and btw...i did something incredible today!!! wahahaha..=)))

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

today was another normal day....but....got MORE PICS!!


managed to take this during geog lesson..i rotated this pic which i took from under my table..i xing right?? x))


another pic of miss chin..opps

calvin?? bangala??


yifang...say 'ahhhhhh'

look at nat and not at ks



wad happened to edna??



nice hat nat


say hi nat!


who's our artist?


qh admiring the artwork.


yifang and 'shen cai'

nice work right? we've got a great artist amongst us! weeeee.


another one =))

after sch at 202. edna and qh so 'GLAM-LY' eating their prata

AAAAAA and edna bit a piece of her whole prata.

that's all for today i guess. =)) jiayous for amaths test tmr.




Monday, February 05, 2007

HAPPY BIRTHDAY yingxin!





oops.
there's something wrong with the blogger's time. i dunno why. why is everything so weird? nothing seems to be right anymore.
pictures taken ystd



juli and me!!

madm kexin and madm weilin

and.............finally edna and me!! =))) (do u see our forced smiles?)

Sunday, February 04, 2007

why must we be sad over every major event? NDP 2006, fancy drill, footdrill comp. isit because we din do our best? but we tried wad. feelings are so hard to explain..why isit that some of us can just treat not winning as nothing..after we put in that much of effort? why? maybe u just dun care. or u don't wanna care. its up to u la. really hope u will think it over. or maybe u expected it?
today's the footdrill comp..kinda disappointed....yea. but with myself. we came to sch and prepared our uniform. to make sure it was in 'tip-top' condition.yea..arranged the badges and wadsoever..den helped d rest..polish boots and get their uniform ready. den wen we were done..we changed into our uniforms and boarded the bus. the bus was a turtle no more. this time..it was kinda huge. yea..so everyone had ample space. even though we could not sit.


reached EVERGREEN sec in time. and was ushered to our waiting room by the VIs. waited for super long time..and i was kinda down. qh noticed it. yea..thanks qh! =)) was scared la..den..finally managed to cool down after playing with the madms. haha..we started beating each other..den pretend is not we beat de..den quite funny la..jiu laugh and laugh ..


finally..after waiting for so long..we were asked to proceed down to the carpark or wad la..where we had UI. den we made a super big mistake! the sir ask us fall out..but he meant that our commander should besurai us..not for us to fall out..but we all gong gong go fall out..sian..i think minus marks le lo. den straight away moved on to the parade square where we had our real competition. haish..sir maurice did a great job! seriously! but yea well..i guess the squad did make some very super obvious mistakes too la. saw madm joanne when doing hanta in the squad..could see her face...it was SUPER BLACK. kkay..nvm..anyone who saw that will face black black oso la..haish..after the competition we went to the hall..where we waited for abt an hour. sat there and practically slacked. felt really bad then..and went into the so called 'stone' position..aiya..not depression la. den finally they had to announce the results. yea..as u know.we obviously din get anything..but..i think we tried la..esp maurice sir. CHEER UP SIR! =DD.


den after that we sort of went downstairs to wait for our bus..den by that time i was really feeling bad le la..rmb-ed last yr..where we could cheer becoz we had won smth..this year..i could only listen to others cheer .. but well..i guess we'll try harder next yr bahh..they all tried to say things to console us la..but ya..the more they say it..the worse i feel.


then our bus finally came. we took it and i slept through the journey. really sad then..coz i know i did some really big mistakes..really sorry ppl. its my fault. i'd rather u guys scold me den tell me its not my fault. that way i would feel better. reached school den changed out of uniform. ms chan and ms tan wanted to treat us to eat..so we all went kfc. den i actually wanted to stone there again de la..but ahh..somehow vanessa managed to make me laugh. and make me high. moodswings i guess. den we laugh until very jialat abt something..the MISS UNIVERSE -- weilin. dunno leii..every action she did me and van will laugh until very bad. and they ppl around us would stare at us. as in madm kexin and madm catherine. yea..really enjoyed the laughing la. at least make me forget the unhappiness. THANKS VAN! =)


after lunch..everybody went seperate ways. juliana, weilin, kexin and me went across to take 851/852/853. den in the bus..we talked la..but juli, kexin and me kept laughing at weilin. den chat-ted with them until yishun interchange. took bus home. really happy..yea. but i still miss my MOUNTAIN KIA. was super tired when i reached home la..coz this morning wake up at around 5 plus. but still managed to find time to blog. so yea...now gonna sleep le.. tired.


p.s thank u ms chan and ms tan for the meal. we still owe u something which we will give u on mon. (opps)
have some pics. taken long ago. but yea..just wanna put it up

xx and zh

zh arranging the billard balls

the guys doing forfeit

nat doing his forfeit

madm weilin ( before trng)

i'm wearing ahma's shoe

ahma's wearing my shoe and i'm wearing hers


our beloved AHMA!!

Saturday, February 03, 2007

had trng today. many ppl came back. not really alot lar..but madm wenjia, qingyu and joanne came back. we practised lar..footdrills and more footdrills. tmr's the competition le..but we're like somehow still lagging. but ya..really hope to get something out of the comp lo.


their presence made me feel abit out of place leii..esp madm qingyu. just not used to her staring at us. but well..she watched our performance out of the corner of her eye..super kong bu la. and once i zao xia..shit la. very xia suay. but yea..other den that okkay la. so hope tmr will be smooth going.


everybody..who is in the footdrill comp! jiayou! we put in so much effort le..so we must definitely do it de! we can achieve smth de! (: (am i bluffing myself?) haish. we'll just give our best shot..wadever the outcome will be...will be. everyone..take care of urself..drink lots of water and sleep early. (:

Friday, February 02, 2007

today.


lunch-ed at yoshi with ppl. namely qh, yf, edna and JULIAN! hmm..wonder why i put julian's name in caps. hahaha.. anyway..had funny talks with them today. and qianhui calls me BROKEYBACK!! and BAPOH MOUNTAIN!! oh man..and now i go around calling ppl brokeyback! hahaha..super funny. and the rest were talking abt wad drinking wad hua jiu...for more info..ask qh...hahahaha..coz i dunno how to explain. den they moved on to the subject of birthday presents. then we each said wad we wanted for our birthday...hahaha..actually not everyone said la..only yf and qh said..den in the end..went home with yf..while edna.... JULIAN and QIANHUI went to shop around for stuff..talked to yf abt some stuffs in the mrt..cool man. i love it!! hahaha thanks yf. so yea..that's it for today's post. ((:

Thursday, February 01, 2007

had trng ystd..chiong lunch..coz got trng at 3 and sch ended at 2.30. sian..we chiong chiong chiong..in the end no need wear uniform..=(( haha..anyway..had a super duper chao ji bad stomach pain. really pain until cannot ren le la..if can ren..i will definitely ren de..but dunno why..ystd de is excruciating pain la. hmm..anyway..thanks for the concern everyone..and of course..rabbit de chu xian made me feel abit better. thanks ppl. then manage to skip abit of trng..coz our 'dear' commander dowan let me fall in..haha . trained on our footdrills. really hope we can get something in the footdrill comp la. or not will be a super big let down. well..the competition is in ONE DAY!! oh my gosh..well. we can do it de!! jiayou ppl for footdrill comp.! yea.


this post is super short. but yea..the FOCUS is my stomach pain.wahahaha..but ahh..coz other than that..i couldn't think of any other thing to write? and btw..got our badges le..very very happy..now can guang ming zhen da de wear my uniform le..got badges le ma!! hahaha..jkjk.
and tmr there's trng..hope it wun cock up. well..all the best ppl. and madm jacquelyn..please come back!! PLEASE?! =((